Random Acts of Kindness

At the beginning of the summer I made a nice to-do list of all the things I wanted to accomplish this summer. I find myself making lots of lists lately, it's just my reality, if I don't mark it down, it doesn't get done. I read once that you have an 80% better chance of achieving your goals if you mark them down. Ok, now I'm babbling...it's what I do.

SO the list was really two lists, one for things I wanted to get done around the house and the other was a list of fun things I wanted to do this summer.

On that list was the carnival! For various reasons, we haven't been since Ruby was born..so I thought we should make it a point to get there this year. Well , I got to cross it off my list when I found out there wasn't going to be any carnival this year! Instead this year they had the "Lobster Festival", which when I think about it,  most certainly tops the carnival which let's face it, is sketchy at best!

So as part of the festival they had various activities going on in our big metropolis all week. Last Friday they had giant bouncy houses, a huge sandpit with castles made by Maurice Bernard (  very talented local artist ) and a big tent with live music all set up down at the boardwalk.

SO we thought, let's give it whirl! 

When we drove up and Porter caught sight of the castles, I thought he might flap right out of the car he was so excited. It was everything to hold him back until we got there.

Then the catch.

Line-ups.

Of course there HAS to be line-ups, I teach elementary school, I get it, if there were no line ups, well, I am quite aware of the chaos that would ensue. But my boy is not a fan of line ups, it's not so much the lining up, but more the WAITING! He hates it. I mean, he really hates it.

They were letting about 6-7 kids in at a time. But of course as soon as I let go of Porter's hand he darted in the castle before his turn. This kid is quick, quick I tell ya! So I send Mark in there to get him because I am wearing a dress and thought I'd spare the spectators of a front row view of my behind. So it took a few minutes but Mark gets him out and of course Porter took it very well ( yes, that's sarcasm). At this point Porter is having a mini meltdown and then the next 7 kids are allowed in, and Miss Ruby was in line, so she got to go in.

So now Porter is crying and trying to break free of our grasp so he can go in too...but it's not his turn. He took his turn when it actually wasn't his turn :)

And then a random act of kindness.

An old friend that I went to school with was there with her 4 beautiful children. She offered to have her son come out so that Porter could go in.  I didn't let her do that of course, but I tell you, her kindness won't be forgotten.  And she didn't make me feel like it was because Porter had autism either, she said " well, I just thought he might like to go in with Ruby".  I wanted to hug her. I wanted to say thank you..thank you for not looking away, or silently judging me, or pitying me.

We didn't stay much longer, we went over to the sand where I had a small panic attack as I watched Porter running over the hills,  steps away from destroying all of Maurice Bernard's amazing sand castle art! Nooooooo!  Thank God I caught him in time!

And that's when we decided to go home :)

We gave it a whirl!

So old friend, thank you for offering to help. It meant so very much to me. I couldn't say this to you that day because I would have cried, but I thought you should know.

Treasured Memories

Yesterday marked the second anniversary of my Dad's passing. I said each year that I would share a memory...I guess it's my way of keeping him alive. Porter and Ruby will likely not remember their Grampy, but this way, they may feel they know him in some way.

So about 10 years ago Lisa and I were visiting Dad at his apartment.  I'm not sure how we came across it, but we found a binder filled with letters, cards and drawings that Lisa and I had sent him throughout our childhood. This binder stayed with Dad for more than 30 years. I remember how it touched me. And now, what a treasure indeed.

There were several letters and cards, but here are a couple of my favorites:

I thought I was pretty clever using pictures for words and saying " see if you can figure this out"...haha. That sentence was actually written in silver marker, remember those markers that you used to have to shake before they would work? What ever happened to those?


And there were lots of letters like this one written Feb 4th, 1986.  I would have been 10 years old:

Unless you have a magnifying glass, you probably can't read that. So let me share ( I'll keep the spelling mistakes in so it is completely authentic):

"Dear Dad,

I usually start with "hi, how are you, fine I hope" so I won't because I think that is getting boring. So I'll start with How's the weather? Are's is ok I guess. It's always cold in the morning when I walk to school, but I'm usually warm because I'm dressed warm. Well I hope you are doing o.k. I know you are not going to like what I'm saying next but I'm just trying to start a conversation. The kittens are doing great, there both lying on the tub chair licking each other. ( This is an inside joke because my Dad hated cats, although I think he secretly liked them:)  My room stays pretty neat now.  School is doing fine. Nanny MacNeill is doing fine too. I'm in a play tomorrow called Cinderella, it's in french. I'm a stupid stepsister but I do have alot of lines. Well I'm absentminded of what to say so I better go. I used absentminded because I just learned it in school.

See ya soon

Love always, Raelene

I added " Don't mind my messy writing" and lots of hugs and kisses on the bottom:)


Isn't that a hoot? Every now and then I take the binder out and read through the letters and every single time, it fills my heart in a way I can't describe.

Thank you Dad.

xoxoxo

Project Lifesaver

Well, we finally did it.  We've been talking for months about getting Porter a GPS tracking bracelet through Project Lifesaver, but today we actually did it.  Those of you close to me probably remember Avonte Oquendo, the boy with autism from New York who tragically went missing from his school back in October. His body was later found  ( after more than a 3 month search ) along the East River.

It has been since then that we looked into Project Lifesaver. We knew Porter would not be a big fan of wearing this bracelet , so the original plan was to slowly get him used to the idea of wearing it by first wearing a plastic watch or bracelet and letting him keep it on longer and longer each day.  We went through quite a few different possibilities and of course he kept taking them off. So we basically decided that we should just go ahead and put it on.

If you're wondering what it looks like or how it works, I've taken the next paragraph directly from the website. ( if you want to learn more, click here . )

How it works

"Citizens enrolled in Project Lifesaver wear a small personal transmitter around the wrist or ankle that emits an individualized tracking signal. If an enrolled client goes missing, the caregiver notifies their local Project Lifesaver agency, and a trained emergency team responds to the wanderer’s area. Most who wander are found within a few miles from home, and search times have been reduced from hours and days to minutes. Recovery times for PLI clients average 30 minutes — 95% less time than standard operations."

I have been dreading putting in on Porter because this is a boy who has a lot of sensory issues and would gladly be naked 100% of the day because even his clothes drive him crazy! So we have been putting it off. Then on Canada Day we went to visit family at Marco Polo Land. It is like Disney Land for kids really, so much to do there! Anyway, we were at the park and Porter was having a blast running up and down the slide and then it happened. We turned our back for less than 5 seconds and he was gone. It was probably no longer than 30 seconds until we spotted him running like the wind, he had crossed one of the roads, passed a row of campers and was running down a hill through the trees. Thank you Lord.

So that was it. I called the next day.

So we had two special guests come see us today. Top shelf people. Porter wasn't in a great mood to begin with, but we gave him a popsicle and they put it on him while he was distracted. Nothing. He sat and ate his popsicle and maybe glanced at it once. Seriously???

But when the popsicle was gone he did get a little upset. We decided not to give him too much time to think about it. It was Ruby's nap time, so Mark took him for a drive. They went to the park, Wendy's for fries outside on the picnic table and then a walk on the boardwalk. Doesn't get much better than that! haha Later when Ruby woke up, we took a drive to Gateway Village and played at that park for awhile. He hasn't had a lot of time to really think about it, but he has taken our hand a few times today and put it on the bracelet. This means " take it off mom and dad!!!". I keep telling him that this is his special safety bracelet that stays on ( it literally has to be cut off to remove it).  Then at bedtime he got a little more upset and tugged at it for a couple minutes, but that's it. I'm not kidding myself that this is it, but so far, it's going a gazillion times better than I thought it would!

We may be frequenting many parks this week:)  Here are a few pics from today.

The boy loves a swing!

FRIES!!

Classic Porter! 

Close up of his new hardware!

I hope and pray that we will NEVER have to use it and it certainly isn't going to protect him from all of the potential dangers he could face, but it is a little more peace of mind.