Ruby and Research!

So Ruby Duby Doo got her first tooth the other day. I knew something was up, she just hasn't been her normal happy-go-lucky self and she has been drooling like crazy! But even though I knew it was coming, I still found myself shocked when it happened.  But then I realized she is right on schedule, I'm just not. I can't believe my girl is 6 months old already. Everyone always says "enjoy these moments, they go by so fast".

Darn it if they aren't right.

They DO go by so fast.

It seems like just yesterday she was learning how to hold her head up and now here she is learning to crawl ( this video doesn't even do justice to how much distance she is getting!)

Did you notice how she looks at me when I call her name? I did. I find myself double checking things like that.  I wouldn't be human if I wasn't concerned at all if she will have autism too. Statistics say that she has a 1in 5 chance as a sibling (although I've read it is lower for girls.)  I'll admit, it scares me a little. But then, I feel guilt for praying that she doesn't have it. I mean, Porter is perfectly perfect exactly the way he is, but watching him struggle to communicate breaks my heart daily and that is because of autism, so if I could take it away, I would. However, if (and that is a BIG IF) it happens and Ruby does have autism, we will be so much better prepared this time. In fact we are now officially a part of an autism sibling research study. If you want to learn more about it, click on this link:

http://autism.medicine.dal.ca/participating_in_studies/studies/infant_siblings_asd.php


Now it would be ideal if we lived in the Halifax area because if she shows signs of autism they are offering early intervention right away. No waiting lists. But we figured that if she does show signs we will get her on the waiting list here much sooner and I'm guessing that having researchers back you up on your concerns may possibly speed up the process:)

But having said all of that, I'm probably not as worried about our girl as I thought I would be. I spent hours while she was still growing inside me reading about the possibility of her having autism and those first few weeks after she was born I found myself looking her over and desperately trying to get her to make eye contact before she was even developmentally ready! But as each day passes, I worry less and less. It's more of an instinct that she is just fine. With Porter it was a feeling that just wouldn't go away and it started early, if I tell you how early, you'll think I'm completely loony so I'll save that for another day. But with Ruby, I just don't have that feeling.

I worry about her for other reasons though.

I worry that her little heart is breaking every time she looks up at her big brother and he pays absolutely no attention to her. I worry that kids might ask her "what's wrong with your brother?" when she gets older. I worry that she will feel that he gets way more attention than her. I worry that she will be fearful that her own children will have autism. I worry that her and Porter won't be best friends like I hope. I worry that she will imitate some of his undesirable behaviour. I worry that she won't understand why he flaps his hands like that.

I could go on all day. So yes, I do worry about her. But in ways I didn't expect.

I do know that she will grow up with an infinite amount of love. And I do know that she will learn so much from her brother. He has taught us so much already and he is not even 3 years old . These things I do know for sure.

Rae